Saturday, December 20, 2014

THE MOST HORRIBLE TIME OF THE YEAR: ADDRESSING CHRISTMAS CARDS!


(This is a rerun of a blog I wrote a couple of years ago.)


Whew, it’s done! I addressed the last Christmas card and stamped the last envelope! I just hate doing Christmas cards. And we send a lot of them. It’s so boring and tedious! Sitting at the kitchen table trying to match up cards and envelopes and writing down all these names and addresses and then SIGNING the cards and stamping and sealing the envelopes…ugh, not my favorite part of the season.

While working on this task I was thinking of my favorite Christmas song to make the job more pleasant, and then found myself inventing some new lyrics. The finished effort is really, really stupid. So I thought I’d post it on the Internet! Ha!

To refresh your memory, here are the original lyrics: 


It's the most wonderful time of the year
With the kids jinglebelling and everyone telling you
Be of good cheer
It's the most wonderful time of the year

It's the hap-happiest season of all
With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings
When friends come to call
It's the hap-happiest season of all

There'll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting And caroling out in the snow
There'll be scary ghost stories
And tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago

It's the most wonderful time of the year
There'll be much mistletoe-ing
And hearts will be glowing
When loved ones are near
It's the most wonderful time of the year

And now for Cindy’s silly words:

It's the most horrible time of the year
With stamps that need licking
And address labels that need sticking
It's the most horrible time of the year


It's the ted-tedioust season of all
With those holiday greetings that are sent instead of meeting
with friends when they call
It's the bor-boringest season of all

There'll be paper cuts flowing
And writer’s cramp growing
With every card that I write
There'll be addresses that need checking
And names that need correcting
Until I finally get it right

It's the most horrible time of the year
There'll be procrastination and dreading
As I wish that I could be heading
Anyplace but here
It's the most horrible time of the year


1 comment:

LetTheRaineFall said...

If it's that difficult for you to manage, why don't you just let the adults handle the Christmas Cards? Or just do everyone a favour, and don't filth up their mailbox on Christmas with something you've touched. Disgusting, that you push your evil filthy and worthless self on your family! You really have no shame do you??? You're so pathetic!! Just do everyone a favour and leave them alone. Leave everyone alone you disgusting scuzbag!! You're so pathetic, and gut-wrenchingly awful! I hate you, you worthless piece of trash!! You're an awful mother and person!